wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize