You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
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