You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
