So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize