i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
He has the fingertips of a God
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