I wannas sexs uuuuu
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
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