Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
