Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
