So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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