she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
