Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
