So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
3 2 1 whiskey
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.