Whats the glycemic index on semen?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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