Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I just found puke in my bra..
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
