somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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