he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
