Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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