why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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