thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
