I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
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