they said they heard you say put it in my butt
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
