Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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