K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
