Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
How does one acquire holy water?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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