I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
