Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
is this the sara with the beer cane?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize