Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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