i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
