her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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