i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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