Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Randomize
