Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
