Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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