It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize