i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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