hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
