what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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