problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
