Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
