It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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