Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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