Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
