But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
