He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
