she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
