A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
wanna go halves on a baby?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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