I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Please, let me fuck your mom
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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