I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
