Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
