...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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