Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
